Someday is Today

I am almost home.  Just around the corner, down the street, to the door.  I am coming home.  I woke up to peace two days ago.  The peace that comes with the knowing that it is the end.  The end of discomfort, the end of loss, the end of being lost.  It's the peace in the exhale, the peace in the reflection of my eyes, the knowing.  I know, with all of my heart, that I am done.  That I can lay these past few months to rest because I am ready to move on.  I am ready.  Thank you, my dear inner girl, for being so patient.  And thank you, my beautiful body, for never leaving me alone, for working over time to make up for the damage I have put you through.  

In two days, I will have come to the end of a taper schedule that I have been comfortable with.  In two days, I will wake up a non-drinker.  There is a lightness in my decision that I didn't trust would come.  But a part of me did trust that it will come because she, we, I, never lost the hope that someday, someday would be today.  

I know that there will be manipulative whispers and at times, roars, to convince me to return to that soul-less life.  There may be times I slip and fall, but I am focusing on building my life and my heart around a space that doesn't want to slip.  I am returning to my core, the core that connects us to the something greater, the god, the energy, the being, the whatever it may be.  I am starting the journey to find that connection I know exists.  To live with the magic, the freedom, the whispers of greater things than myself.  

I'm coming home.